To Tear Down A Wall - Part 2

Last week, I talked about when to build up walls. Using the Armor of God, renewing our minds, not allowing ourselves to get involved in the intentional, sinful behavior of the world, friends, and even other believers, and keeping our minds on those things that are praiseworthy will help protect us from the worldly sins that threaten to overtake us all. This week, I want to talk about when to tear down walls.

Walls that separate us from God, as well as walls that separate us from healthy relationships, are walls that need to come down. Let’s talk first about the walls that separate us from God.

We are told in Isaiah 59:1-2, “Surely the arm of the Lord is not too short to save, nor His ear too dull to hear. But your iniquities have separated you from your God; your sins have hidden His face from you, so that He will not hear.” Unrepentant sin creates a barrier between us and God. He is Holy, and He cannot ignore or turn a blind eye to our sin, nor can He be in relationship with us in our lives of unforgiven sin.

Most often, our sins against God happen in our relationships with others, or in the way we treat ourselves. While we go about our days with bitterness, resentment, anger, pride, or engaging in acts of sexual immorality, gluttony, or idolatry, God’s children get hurt, and He turns away from us. Therefore, repentance and asking for forgiveness must happen before the walls between us and God can come down.

Repentance is not simply to say, “oops, I messed up” and then move on. It is defined in Vine’s Dictionary of the Bible as, “to turn away from wickedness,” and “to rearrange your entire way of thinking, feeling and being in order to forsake that which is wrong.” It is a complete transformation of the way you see a behavior or response, and then shifting your thoughts, emotions, and actions in relation to that behavior or response. This is a verb, it requires action on our part. First, we must recognize the sin and realize the gravity of what that sin means in our relationships, then we must pray that God will lead us away from sin, and finally, we must make the decision to choose a healthier, more righteous behavior or response. Repentance is the bulldozer to the wall that separates us from God.

A simple, but yet profound, example of this awakening and understanding happened in my early days of following Jesus. I was not exactly the easiest person to live with sometimes. I am a Type A personality, and as a new Christian, I had not yet developed the fruits of the Spirit; specifically peace, patience, kindness, and gentleness. My husband, on the other hand, was an avoider, which meant that he would avoid conflict at all costs to keep the peace. I liked order; I liked organization; I needed to feel cared for and loved, and for me, that happened best when he helped me. He liked fun; he liked relaxation; and he needed to feel respected and appreciated. In my “Type A-ness,” showing him respect and appreciation when I was angry and wanting things done was not always my strong suit.

Scripture sometimes uses funny statements to make a point, and it was in one of those funny statements that a point was made very clear to me. Proverbs 21:9 so artfully declares, “It is better to live in a corner of the housetop than in a house shared with a quarrelsome wife.” Yikes!! That is exactly what I was, a quarrelsome wife, and while I lived that out, my poor husband retreated to every corner of the rooftop to get away from me, and I did not even realize that is what he was doing. Once the giggles from that statement soaked in, so did the reality that I was not living out the life I vowed to live. I had built up walls against my husband, and against the Lord, and I needed to repent. Repentance – “Oh, Lord, forgive me for the way I have treated my husband. Help me to be a better wife to him, to be the gift you created me to be for him. Lord, shut my mouth and soften my heart towards my husband. Help him to come off the rooftop and connect with me. Lord, lead us into the kind of marriage you designed us to have.” I needed to change my behavior, and that took making different choices, leaning on God to help me be a softer version of myself, breaking down the walls between God and me, and between me and my husband, and that happened by repenting of my sin. As I acted in obedience to changing my behavior, God went to work transforming my heart, changing the way I viewed my husband, and breaking down walls with and for me.

Scripture beautifully recounts the ultimate sacrifice that tore down the walls between us and God and provided a way for us to have relationship with Him. It happened in the moment of Jesus’ death on the cross. In that moment, Jesus died for our sins – all of them, past, present, and future – so that we could repent and be forgiven, allowing the walls between us and God to be forever torn down. See, prior to that moment, the only way God’s people could be forgiven was through a priest, and then ultimately a high priest, who, after hearing confessions of sins, would enter the most Holy place once a year to atone for them with God. There was a curtain, a wall of sorts, between God and the people because of sin. God simply could not, and cannot, be in the presence of sin. Matthew 27:50-51 recounts the moment when that wall was torn down, “And when Jesus had cried out again in a loud voice, he gave up his spirit. At that moment the curtain of the temple was torn in two from top to bottom. The earth shook and the rocks split.” The walls came down. It is now up to us to go to the Lord, to atone for our sins through repentance, and ask Him for forgiveness.

The walls of unforgiveness, the walls of competition, the walls of dissension, mistrust, and jealousy all need to come down. They are divisive, and they can sometimes cause irreversible damage in our relationships, including damaging our relationship with God. The Apostle Paul addresses this point as well in Ephesians 4:31-32, “Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.”

Similarly, remembering Romans 3:23, “for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,” will help us to recognize that while we may feel justified in our anger, there have been times when those close to us may have felt justified in their anger against us as well. In relationships, we are not to “keep score” of offenses, but rather, as Colossians 3:12-13 commands, “as God’s chosen people, Holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.” Forgiveness does not always mean reconciliation; however, the failure to forgive will always mean there will be walls between you and God, and may prevent intimacy in other relationships as well.

These examples are the sledgehammers that break down unhealthy, harmful walls that keep us from enjoying intimate relationships and deep connection with those we love. As we begin to love others intimately, the way God designed His children to love, we can grow closer and more intimate with our Savior. Our relationships, both with Him and with fellow believers, are more important to Jesus than anything else. He loves us, and the way He wants us to show our love to Him is by loving each other. We cannot do that through concrete walls.

Are there walls you need to tear down?